Tom MacKay’s NLP Blog

So to review the last blog, this client was in real inner conflict. When she was on her own she really wanted to be with her boyfriend, but when she was too close to someone she wanted to be on her own!

Basically when she was living on her own the part of her that wanted freedom was satisfied and didn’t surface, but moving in with her boyfriend brought it to the surface.

So what was she to do? How could she deal with this part of her that continually sabotaged her relationship?

We did the NLP Parts integration technique. This is one of the most effective methods of negotiating to achieve a win win situation. Basically the process involves separating the behaviour from the intention behind it by chunking up both sides until they can find agreement. For example, many years ago in the nuclear arms race, many people wanted total disarmament, wheareas the other side wanted more weapons. This caused a huge amount of tension. However, the intention behind each side (chunked up to a high enough level) was to achieve world peace, however they had very different methods of wanting to do it.

There is no point just arguing about the specific methods or behaviours used, but by finding the highest intention we can begin with a basis for agreement and then find other methods to fulfil this highest positive intention that both sides agree on.

More on how this was used with the clients conflict in the next NLP blog…

In the meantime, if you are aware of any internal conflict that his holding you back, why not reserve your place at our next NLP Practitioner training between March 14 – 20 in London, UK. Alternatively join our hypnotherapy training on March 5th.

In the last NLP blog I was talking about thinking about the things that are most important to you in life. Most goal setting workshops talk about the importance of writing them down.

This is really important – you want to regularly review your outcomes, not just think about them once, but keep reviewing them. What will help your outcomes really take more substance is to transform them just from words, and use all of the different senses.

The more substance you can bring to these outcomes, the more drive you will have to achieve them. On our NLP Coach Training I recommend people to draw pictures, create sounds and use their physiology to really step into these outcomes to bring them to life. Some people create ‘dream boards’ where they cut out pictures they find from magazines, draw or paint their own pictures, find recordings of music or sounds and even find material and textures to represent aspects of their outcomes. I certainly recommend that if all you do is write down your outcomes, that you do it with a quality pen and quality paper, preferably some sort of journal that you can regularly review. On our NLP Trainings and Hypnotherapy courses, we always stress the importance of symbolism to your unconscious mind. Just think about setting outcomes – if you write down your outcomes on old scraps of paper with a rubbish pen, what does that unconsciously symbolize about your outcomes? If you write it on quality paper with a quality pen, what would that symbolize?

More about goals in the next blog…

Carrying on from my last blog…

I started to really create the life of my dreams after learning NLP. I started to work on my dreams and set clear outcomes, one of them being to go to drama college. At the time I was actually studying music at the Royal Acedemy of Music, where I trained as a professional violinist. Although I was exceedingly talented, it was not what I really wanted to do – it was a dream of my parents and not mine. I never really thought I would get to drama college, but after learning NLP I decided I would pursue my dream.

So whilst at college I started coaching clients using NLP and hypnotherapy and also spent weeks and weeks in my spare time busking at Covent Garden, even in the coldest mid-winter days. After some time, I finally raised enough money to pay for a drama course and spent the next year at drama college studying acting, which was a truly wonderful and rewarding experience.

It was only after learning NLP that I realized that we really can create the life we want.

Over the next few blogs, I am going to go through tools and techniques to help accomplish goals – some of the things that can help turn dreams into reality!

So start to think about the things that are most important to you and what you are most passionate about – the outcomes you have that you are most inspired by are the ones you will really put the energy into.

Happy New Year!

I hope everyone has a prosperous and fulfilling new year.

2009 was a challenging time for people all over the world. NLP training and the training industry in general has been going through a time of change. Many organizations have cut training budgets as these are the first things to be reduced.

However more and more people are realizing that NLP training is really the way forward. Going on an NLP course is not just about developing skills, but is a way to help you turn your dreams into reality.

I remember back in 1990 when I first attended an NLP training, I had dreams about being able to do public speaking, but it was something that terrified me. I just thought that some people were born with the skill and if you were, then you were one of the lucky ones.

When I started learning NLP, I discovered that I could really be in charge of my mind and my emotions to a large extent and that overcoming fears like public speaking could be done relatively quickly. The years I had spent holding on to my fears were soon transformed into a passion for presenting!